a proposal for a politically correct calendar

i believe we should eliminate all state sponsored support of religion. to that end i have proposal for removing religion from our calendars which are based heavily on ancient pagan religions. the days of the week should be renamed. we could have firstday, seconday, thirday, fourthday, fifthday, sixthday, and seventhday. (while we're at it let's throw in an eighthday and have a three day weekend every week!) now i'm going to go work on the months. here are some preliminary thoughts: cold. colder. windy. rainy. flowery. hot. hotter. hell. back-to-school. pumpkinleaves. turkey. crass commercialism.